two is better than one
It’s been awhile since I’ve posted something on here. It seems as though my creative energy has been primarily going into my painting and practicing my calligraphy - two things that bring me a lot of joy. I’m always writing, however I have been slacking on my blog posts, that is for sure.
March was a busy month for me. I had a lot of weekend getaways and many loved ones from back home graced me with visits. My grandparents flew through Vancouver on their way to a warmer place, my Mom popped over for some quality one-on-one time and my brothers came together to see me. I was also lucky enough to see two of my best friends from back home. Overall, I was left feeling incredibly happy to be gifted the time I had with each of these people who mean so much to me. I am grateful to have people in my life who are willing to fly to see me wherever I am, and take time out of their lives to make time for me. Not only to see me, but to see the life I have created for myself in this new place. Having visitors is tiring and busy, but it is also so incredibly special.
Goodbyes have never been an easy feat for me. Since I was a little girl I would cry my eyes out whenever I had to part with someone I loved, and it’s safe to say that not much has changed. It’s hard when you become accustomed to your routine without your family or friends from home. I have a life here that does not include seeing them regularly, which is something different for me. Family is everything to me, and being away from the ones I love the most has definitely been tough at times, but it has also helped me grow and made me stronger as an individual. I never take my family for granted; or the support and love I receive from them daily - no matter how far away we are. As I was saying, I had adjusted to not having them around, so when they do come to visit I am reminded of how happy I am when we are together, which makes the goodbye that much harder. Suddenly, they are gone again and it takes time to adjust back again. But I always do. After one goodbye, a good friend of mine asked me if I ever thought the goodbyes would get easier. I responded right away, “no I don’t.” It’s just the way I am. “You love hard,” they said in return.
Goodbyes never get easier for me, and having my heart divided in two has been a new learning experience this year. I have definitely fallen in love with the beauty of the west coast, with my amazing friend group here, my independence, freedom, continuous adventures and so much more. But Winnipeg will always be my home, my place, my people, and I feel thankful to be able to have two places that mean so much to me. I will never stop defending Winnipeg whenever a smug, uninformed west coaster sends some disrespectful remark my way. My loyalty runs deep. I feel so blessed to come from a place that keeps me humble, feeds my hunger to experience new things and all the while providing a safety net for me - somewhere that greets me with instant comfort and love upon each return.
April brings many decisions as I near the brink of another transition. Where I will go next, where I will be in the next few months and where I will end up. Thus is life, as it is inevitable that we will spend the majority of our time trying to figure it out — whatever “it” may be. I am energized by the change in seasons, by approaching the brink of warm weather and long summer days. And by the ongoing invitation to plod along, focusing on an open mind and an open heart.
Transitions used to scare me a lot more, and I can say with confidence that I have seen personal growth in this area of my life as I continue to lean into the unknowns, trust the process and rely on the people who steadily provide me with a firm foundation.
Thank you to all of you.
A